What are you avoiding by fixating on your body?
If you’re fixating on your body a lot, you probably believe a better body equals a better life.
But, body fixation isn’t usually about your body – it’s a sign that something else needs your attention.
Unfortunately, living in an appearance obsessed culture makes you believe that your body really IS a problem that needs fixing.
So in this post, I’m doing a deep dive into what’s really going on behind the guise of body fixation.
I’ll be sharing:
- The role fixating on your body plays in protecting you from difficult emotions
- Why decoding what you’re really feeling is vital for helping you to break free of body fixation
- An exercise to decode what you’re avoiding by fixating on your body
- Why body image work is about so much more than the way you feel about your body!
Watch or read below:
What does fixating on your body mean?
Today I want to talk about what you might be avoiding by fixating on your body.
You see, body fixation is usually a sign that something within you needs your attention, that there is an emotion that needs addressing.
Fixating on your body can be a way to avoid difficult emotions such as fear, shame, hurt, rejection, or loneliness.
Often these emotions have nothing to do with your body and everything to do with how you feel about yourself.
Body fixation through dieting, obsessive exercise or other forms of appearance fixing can be a way to protect you from what’s really troubling you.
And because hating your body has become so normalised in our culture, it’s easy to assume that your body is the reason you don’t feel good about yourself and ‘fixing’ it will make you feel better.
Decoding why you’re fixating on your body
To improve your body image AND your self-worth, you need to notice when you are having negative body thoughts or the urge to fix your body.
Then, try decoding the feelings about your body and get to the root of what you’re really feeling about yourself.
Here are a few coaching questions to help you figure out what you might be avoiding by fixating on your body:
1. What am I feeling in this moment?
Label the emotion you’re experiencing whether it’s shame, fear, loneliness or whatever.
You might find this video, How to cope with negative body feelings, useful in helping you acknowledge the emotion you’re experiencing.
2. What am I believing about myself?
Try to identify the belief that is driving the emotion.
For example, perhaps you believe that you must be a certain weight or dress size before you can find a partner, start your own business, whatever.
3. What could I be avoiding by fixating on my body?
This question requires you to be open-minded and curious.
Even if you think your body IS an issue, play along and think about what you could be avoiding by body fixation.
For example, if you’ve been trying to lose weight before finding a new partner, or applying for a new job, you might actually be avoiding doing those things for fear of rejection.
Body fixation is about more than your body!
If you can’t identify what you’re avoiding by fixating on your body right away, don’t worry. Try answering the questions again later.
Because I can pretty much guarantee, that at the root of body fixation are issues with self-worth.
My body fixation was rooted in a deep sense of not feeling good enough. Working on my body seemed like a good way to feel good about myself.
Once I accepted my body, I noticed that the feeling of not being ‘good enough’ was still there. It just resurfaced in other areas like my relationships and work.
If you need help discovering what you’re avoiding by fixating on your body, we cover this on my 1:1 Coaching Programme, The Body Confidence Journey.
If you’d like to know more about the programme, and if it’s a good fit for you, answer a few questions for me and I’ll get right back to you:
